Monroe in mourning Victims of tour bus accident recalled as friendly, vibrant BY SETH MANDEL Staff Writer Monroe resident Sid Godis (above) looks at a photograph on the wall of the Jewish Congregation of Concordia that includes several of the victims from last week's bus crash embarking on a prior vacation. At right, Morton Schneider and wife Mildred were among the many who turned out for services last week in memory of the Monroe residents who were killed when their tour bus crashed in Chile. Initial shock and disbelief gave way to sadness and prayer over the past week as Monroe Township mourned the tragic deaths of 10 residents of The Ponds adult community. "What can you say? I can't describe what the feeling is," said Ponds resident Jack Maffai, who knew some of the victims. "It's just a devastating thing ... a lot of people in a lot of shock." The 10 residents were killed along with two others from Connecticut when their tour bus reportedly swerved to avoid an oncoming truck near the Chilean town of Arica, and tumbled several hundred feet down a mountainside March 22. The bus was taking its passengers back to the Celebrity Cruise Line ship Millennium, where the tourists were to rejoin the other passengers who were taking part in the B'nai B'rith-organized cruise vacation. SCOTTPILLING staff Those who were killed in the accident are Marian Diamond, 76; Hans, 72, and Maria Eggers, 71; Robert, 72, and Barbara Rubin, 69; Arthur, 67, and Frieda Kovar, 74; Carol Ruchelman, 63; Marvin, 79, and Shirley Bier, 76, all of The Ponds; and Ira, 68, and Linda Greenfield, 63, of Stamford, Conn. Harold Ruchelman, 68, and Bernie Diamond, 66, who each lost their wives in the crash, were injured and are now recovering at home. On the night of the accident, Maffai, a bowling partner of Art Kovar's, turned on the news and heard the first reports of the accident. "I turned to my wife and I said, 'That sounds an awful lot like the trip that Art just went on,' " Maffai said. "But then we looked at each other and we said, 'What's the odds that it's the same trip?' " JEFF GRANIT staff Residents of the quiet adult community that is The Ponds were shaken last week to find out that 10 of their neighbors were among the 12 killed when their bus crashed on a Chilean mountainside. Many recalled the victims as vibrant, friendly and active seniors who were enjoying their golden years together. Some of the details didn't make sense, he said, leaving him to believe it was just a terrible coincidence. But Maffai's initial fears were confirmed by a neighbor the next morning, after word reached the community. Like countless others, Maffai found the news to be surreal, and just difficult to believe. "It's never your people when it happens on the news," he noted. Art Kovar was a travel enthusiast who often organized such trips. He spearheaded the 14-day South America tour and already had plans for future trips in the works. When Leonard and Frieda Posnock, longtime friends of the Kovars, moved to The Ponds three years ago, Art Kovar was one of the first to welcome them, and immediately told them of the frequent group trips, including those to Australia and China. "His thing was travel. I think they've been everywhere," Frieda Posnock said. "This whole group went together on lots of trips, and I think the numbers got bigger and bigger every trip they took." Though the Posnocks were unable to join the South America tour, Kovar told them he was planning a New Year's Eve cruise, and he would send them brochures. "And we never got that far," Frieda said. Kovar coached Frieda's son years ago in Little League baseball in Clark, and Frieda cannot remember Kovar ever raising his voice. "He was a very kind man, and Frieda [Kovar] as well. They were just plain, ordinary, nice, simple people," Posnock said. "They're just going to be missed, they really are." The community, overcome with grief, wanted to honor the memories of their friends as soon as the news hit. Rabbi Eliezer Zaklikovsky, of the Chabad Jewish Center of Monroe, helped bring the residents together for a prayer service at the center the day after the accident. "It's hard to describe the grief, the shock, the bombshell that fell onto that community," Zaklikovsky said. "Over the course of the day, I realized that the community wanted to react, in some form, spontaneously. ... And though we had only a couple of hours to put it together, the house was full to capacity." About 75 people attended, recalling personal accounts of the kindness and warmth that personified the victims during their lives. A candle was lit for each of the deceased, a cantor led the group in a memorial prayer, and the traditional Kaddish prayer for the departed was recited. Through tears, one woman said she was planning to attend the cruise, but backed out after she was late with her deposit and the price of the trip went up. Another couple said they would have gone on the trip but stayed home to attend a family bar mitzvah. "It was a very, very moving event," Zaklikovsky said. While sorrow flooded the gates of the Ponds, the emotional residents managed to keep one another afloat. That, Zaklikovsky said, is how a community must heal in times of distress; they must find strength in numbers. The close-knit nature of the community, he said, can have two effects. On one hand, because the residents are so close, the impact of such a tragedy can be magnified. "But yet on the other hand, it allows for people to fall back on each other to find comfort and strength. And that's what's been happening," he said. Michel Morend, a church deacon and Ponds resident, agreed. Morend led a prayer service Friday morning at The Ponds, the purpose of which, he said, was twofold: to honor the memories of those lost in the crash, and to give the members of the community an opportunity to speak with one another. Simple conversation, Morend said, can sometimes help more than anything. "They are wonderful," Morend said. "They are very strong people, and I think it's wonderful because they know how to help each other." Morend is no stranger to helping people cope with adversity. He has held counseling sessions at Bergen Pines County Hospital in Paramus for 18 years. Morend said The Ponds community is like one big family. "We are very close with our neighbors here, we always have each other," Morend said. Several of the deceased were active in the local Jewish Congregation of Concordia. The Kovars and Rubins were members of the temple, as were Marian Diamond and Carole Ruchelman. Grace Mitgang, who works in the synagogue office, said Ruchelman was a wonderful person, and a pleasure to know. "When she walked into the temple, it was always a nice visit," Mitgang said. Tom Miskel, a resident of The Ponds who was friendly with the Rubins, said the couple was celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary on the cruise, and the accident actually happened on Robert Rubin's birthday. Miskel said the Rubins were "wonderful people," and that residents could count on Robert, who was the president of the photography club, if they had computer trouble, and Barbara was a mah jongg player and a regular at the bowling alley. Miskel and a few friends recently traded stories about the Rubins, and each one made him smile. Miskel was also friends with Hans and Maria Eggers, with whom he attended dances and other social events. Hans was the handyman, Miskel said, and Maria was a fabulous cook. "Everybody loved them, they were a tremendous loss," Miskel said, adding that the Eggers were expecting to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary in October. You could call Hans anytime, day or night, Miskel said, and the handyman would graciously come to the rescue, while Maria would periodically bake cakes for an 83-year-old Ponds resident. Maria's cooking gave Miskel one of his most profound and intense memories. Miskel said Maria would make a German dish of salami and cream cheese, and his recollection of it was tangible while driving home recently. "I could taste it," Miskel said. "That's amazing. That's some kind of sign or something." But the loss of his friends the Eggers and the Rubins still leaves him with a powerful sadness, knowing how much they will be missed and the celebrations they were looking forward to. "It hurts," he said. Miskel said it is painful to talk about the accident, though he feels it is a healthy part of the process. Zaklikovsky said sharing those memories, especially as many residents have gone from funeral to funeral this week, will aid in reminding the residents that, in many ways, the victims live on, having had such a righteous and beneficial impact on the world they have left behind. "Time will heal a lot," Zaklikovsky said. "But I think to find strength in the positive legacy that these people leave behind, and try to continue them - everybody has such wonderful memories of these people - and to incorporate those memories, will keep the souls alive, and will give strength to all those people who are continuing." The bodies of the victims were flown home Friday, while a second plane carried the two survivors. The process of having the bodies released by Chilean authorities was expedited by the immediate involvement of a Chabad burial service from Miami, Fla., which was contacted by Celebrity Cruise Line. Representatives of the burial service were flown on a chartered plane to Arica, where they met the bodies and the survivors. When the bodies arrived at John F. Kennedy International Airport in New York, Zaklikovsky was there to say the appropriate prayers before the bodies were transported to the individual funeral homes. The funerals for Carole Ruchelman and the Kovars took place Sunday; services for the Rubins, Biers and Marian Diamond were held Monday. Government officials offered their support as the deaths were confirmed Thursday. State Assemblywoman Linda Greenstein, whose district includes Monroe, called the crash "a tragedy far beyond words," and Gov. Jon Corzine offered his sympathy and support to the community. "No words can ease the heartbreak of such sudden devastation," Corzine said. "But in these moments, we draw strength from shared faith in a loving God, and in the certain knowledge that we are not alone in our pain." Monroe Mayor Richard Pucci also addressed the community at Friday morning's heavily attended service, and ordered that flags fly at half-staff in the days after the accident. There will be another service for all the deceased following Sabbath services this Saturday, at the Chabad center, 261 Gravel Hill Road. Services will begin at 9:30 a.m. and conclude at about noon, Zaklikovsky said. Because memorial services are not to be conducted on the Sabbath, the kiddush - the blessing of the wine that follows Sabbath services - will be dedicated to the victims, and the entire community is invited to attend and share their memories of the victims. Frieda Posnock said there is no way to be prepared for such a nightmare. Twelve neighbors, she said, who were here just last week, have been lost, leaving a painful, but valuable, lesson. "Life is very fragile. You've got to live every moment for the moment," Posnock said, adding that that concept is easy to understand but difficult to practice. But when a tragedy of this magnitude happens, she said, "I think you sit back and reflect on things very differently." Art Kovar was never sitting still, Maffai said, but since the crash, a fixture in the scenic community is now just a memory. "You'd go out there in the morning, except when it's real cold in the middle of the winter, and he's walking around the development with the same two friends that he walks around with all the time," Maffai said. Several residents of The Ponds, including Maffai, commented that the harsh reality of what has happened was yet to truly set in. "You expect to see Art at bowling next week," Maffai said. "After a while, you realize that he's not coming back."